Press Article: Family Dynamics at Birthdays: Navigating Feelings of Exclusion
In a heartfelt letter to R. Eric Thomas, a mother reflects on her daughter Tess’s recent 40th birthday celebration, expressing feelings of exclusion. The mother recounts a dinner shared with Tess, her husband Mack, and their children, followed by a surprising revelation: Mack organized a separate gathering at a bar for Tess, inviting his large family while excluding her own.
Despite being hurt by this decision, the mother chose to remain silent to avoid conflict, having previously faced disagreements when she expressed her feelings. She suggests that alternative arrangements could have been made for childcare on such an important occasion.
Thomas empathizes, affirming her feelings and pointing out the nuances of family gatherings. He emphasizes that while some celebrations might not include every family member, the nature of this particular event—a birthday—meant that the mother and her family should have been included.
In a warm conclusion, he encourages the mother to consider that Mack might have had the best intentions and to focus on the joy of Tess’s milestone. Ultimately, it’s about celebrating the occasion, regardless of the complexities of family dynamics.
For advice, reach out to R. Eric Thomas at eric@askingeric.com.
Note: The image is for illustrative purposes only and is not the original image of the presented article.



