A woman in her mid-30s writes to Annie Lane about her troubled relationship with her wife in her early 40s. Despite falling fast and hard for each other, the wife’s trust issues from a previous betrayal continue to haunt them. The woman admits to talking to her ex on the phone, causing her wife to become jealous and controlling, leading to hurtful remarks, questions, and distance in their relationship. The woman is heartbroken and doesn’t know what to do, as she loves her wife immensely but can’t handle the cruelty.
Annie advises the woman that her wife’s behavior is unhealthy and potentially emotionally abusive. She encourages the wife to seek individual or couples counseling to address these issues, build trust, and create a healthy relationship.
In another letter, a reader highlights the importance of phone calls over text messages to avoid misunderstandings and arguments due to the lack of tone in written communication. Annie agrees, recommending texts for casual communication and reserving important discussions for phone calls.
Lastly, a reader corrects Annie’s advice to a couple dealing with their adult child’s alcoholism, suggesting they attend Al-Anon meetings for family and friends of alcoholics instead of Alcoholics Anonymous. Annie acknowledges the error and thanks the reader for the clarification.
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