A desperate daughter wrote to advice columnist Annie Lane seeking help for her elderly mother who is stuck in a difficult situation with her hoarding son. The mother moved to the West Coast to be near her children after her husband passed away, but her older son’s hoarding issues have prevented her from selling her East Coast home. The son suffers from mental health issues and refuses to seek help, leading to a toxic and codependent relationship with his mother.
The daughter has tried to help by researching legal options and paying for hoarding removal services, but nothing has worked. The only solution seems to be evicting the son, but the mother is hesitant due to his mental health issues and threats of suicide. The daughter is heartbroken by the situation and has distanced herself emotionally to protect her own mental health.
The columnist advises that it is up to the mother to set boundaries with her son and take the necessary steps to move forward. The mother is urged to continue therapy to gain the tools needed to make difficult decisions. The daughter is encouraged to support her mother in seeking help for her son’s mental health issues.
The situation is challenging and heartbreaking, but with the right support and resources, there is hope for the mother to eventually move forward and make a better life for herself and her family.
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